Who Do You Love Most?

Hey All!  Hope you enjoyed this three-day weekend if you were off for President's Day!

This past Saturday was Valentine's Day.  For those of you who are single, you might have called it "Black Saturday" or "Single Awareness Day."  You might have lamented the fact that you didn't have a sweetheart to spend this day with, and you might have cursed all those couples out there who seemed to be rubbing their abundance and your lack in your face.  You might have also celebrated the money you were saving and treating yourself instead.

Nowhere to go out?  Good!  Save your money, watch a movie, and be good to yourself.  While they're all out wining and dining as an investment in romantic love, you can make an investment in self-love.  They're having surf & turf?  Splurge on some Taco Bell!  You can make yourself laugh, you can make plans for the future, and you can think about how you'd rather spend Valentine's Day next year.

It might be that you're alone because you asked someone out and they said no.  Maybe they thought you "weren't good enough" for them in some way.  Maybe you took this to mean you were not good enough for everyone.  She is wrong, but so are you.

Rejection might be a form of bullying, but if you're bold and bulletproof, you can see that it's the mildest form of bullying there is.  She doesn't have to like you, and that's her choice to make.  But is she the end-all and be-all?  I highly doubt it.  But does that mean you should settle for someone else just so you can say you have a Valentine, and check off some unseen box on the alphaganda checklist?  No way, no how, not even close.  That way of thinking is why more than half of all marriages end in divorce.

You don't need a Valentine on Valentine's Day.   Maybe you want one.  If you'd like to have one, then have the good grace to love yourself first.  That one simple axiom, in and of itself, works better than any of the how-to guides to be a player, a pickup artist, or super-boyfriend that any of those jokers have ever manufactured. Rather, it comports with the Four Pillars -- specifically the ones about Belonging and Deserving.  If not today, then tomorrow.

Yes, you may feel like growling like Johnny Cash when you're single, muttering over those Folsom Prison Blues, and grumbling over your solitude.  Or, you might sing and groove like Barry White, knowing that with the loooooove you have for yourself, you'll be able to share the loooooove when it comes knockin', baby.

I recommend the Barry approach.  It's a lot more fun.  And it works.

I EXIST.  I MATTER.  I BELONG.  I DESERVE.

Good night everybody!

The Last Word on Elliott Rodger

Hi All, Welcome to June!

By now, most of my regular readers will have viewed my video about Elliott Rodger and the rampage he committed on May 23rd in Santa Barbara, California.  I have one last thing to add.

My deductive reasoning tells me that there was one source of his anger that not everyone has touched upon yet.  This anger he had towards the supposed horde of women that rejected him in favor of "real men" originated somewhere.  And that origin simply must have been the alphaganda.  This unsupported, invalid, and blatantly false assertion that if a male has not had sex with a woman by the time he is 16, no 14, no 12, then he is somehow a lesser man.  Unfortunately, instead of realizing that the alphaganda had as much truth behind it as Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, Elliott Rodger bought the alphaganda.  Being deceived by this fraudulent way of thinking led him to believe that (a) the women who rejected him forced him into a lower level of the pecking order, and that (b) as a man, he needed to have sex with them in order to increase in rank.

Someone needed to explain to this young man how untrue this was.  Someone needed to explain to him that being a virgin after high school age was not a badge of shame, a sign of weakness, evidence of unmanliness, or anything negative at all.  Or better yet, they could have simply flipped on MTV, made him watch a few episodes of "Teen Mom," and asked him how he'd feel being one of the "teen daddies" on that show.  I guarantee all of those boys thought they were men before they got the news - how manly or studly do the producers of that show make them look now?  Don't get me wrong, I don't think of the teen moms as innocent little angels, but they are made to seem blameless in comparison to these "cool kids" who know nothing of responsibility.

If somebody could have set him straight, and if he himself could have learned that the alphaganda was false, chances are he would have lived a much more normal life, and not caused all of this senseless violence.  Unfortunately, the alphaganda is sometimes more persuasive than any positive male role models that are available, and that's very unfortunate.

If there are any would-be Elliott Rodgers out there, I hope you're reading this.  I hope you can think first, actually think several times first, and act later.  I hope you have the critical thinking skills to see the flaws in the alphaganda.  I hope you can realize who's an alphole and who's not.  And I hope you can accept the fact that these girls or women, no matter how good, nice, handsome, or funny you are, may still reject you, and hating them for it will not change their minds.

And more than anything, I hope you can realize that the fact that the alpholes claim to have started having sex the day they finished going through puberty has nothing to do with you.  If they are having sex (allegedly) and you're not, that's completely irrelevant.  It is their choice of morals, or complete lack thereof, and it does not mean that you are automatically less than them because you didn't emulate them.  Come to think of it, most families would be better served if more people elected not to have sex until at least their mid-20's.  However, this can only be a choice.   If we lived in a society that regulated morality with painful consequences, we would be no better than the Taliban,

So again, I say to all those Elliott Rodgers out there, never let the alphaganda get under your skin like it did with him.  Learn that it is baseless, groundless, and fraudulent, and that you have no need to follow it.  If you are the same age as this young man and are frustrated that you haven't "done the deed," look at your pay check stub and be thankful that there is no "CHSUPP" deduction.  Be thankful that your last doctor's visit did not include any bad news regarding your health.  Take a good look at your life and realize that you are exempt from the requirements of the alphaganda, and that you fall well outside its jurisdiction.  Let those who choose to follow it make their own mistakes, while you choose your own path in life.  Chances are, you may be ahead of the game and not even know it.

And even if someone turns you down now, at the very least you made a decent effort.  Maybe tomorrow someone else will reward that effort, and that someone else will be worthy of you.  Don't worry so much about you being worthy of someone else.

I EXIST.  I MATTER.  I BELONG.   I DESERVE.

I AM BOLD.  I AM BULLETPROOF.  I AM BETA.

Night All!