Good Morning All, and welcome to the middle portion of Martin Luther King weekend.
There has been some controversy regarding a 90-second commercial produced by Gillette. It questions whether some of society's ills, which have often been perpetrated by men, truly are "the best a man can get," which plays off the company's earlier slogan from the 1990's.
The commercial shows what would be solutions to the problem: fathers stopping fights between their young children and teaching them that bullying is not the right way to treat people; men calling out their friends and associates to not act inappropriately around women, and basically reminding us that being a man does not mean the same thing it did in prehistoric times.
The vast overwhelming majority of men already know that rape is wrong, that women should not be spoken to disrespectfully, and (maybe the overwhelming majority doesn't want to admit this) bullying is also unacceptable, and any father who wants to earn respect has an obligation to teach his children not to behave that way.
This commercial has given yours truly cause for reflection.
(1) It's been a very long time since I used the term "alphole." I have made a conscious effort not to demonize "tough guys," macho types, or high-conflict individuals because everyone deserves respect, particularly those who are different from me. The fact that I personally don't like the way a person carries himself or herself doesn't invalidate them as human beings. I certainly can't take back the multiple times I've taken them to task - they're out there forever - but I can certainly chart my own evolution.
(2) However, there are still people who hurt others. And they often receive no consequences to speak of because they somehow always have a throng of enablers, followers, hangers-on, and fraaaaaaands who reinforce what they do. This ad brought back a reminder of that reality.
(3) If more men raised their children first to not bully those weaker than them, it would be a simple logical extension and expansion of this rule to treat women with more respect, those of other races and nationalities with more respect, and the entire balance of humanity with more respect as well. That would be an absolute good.
(4) Saying this does not demonize all men. We already know that most men are not predators and narcissists - despite the shocking percentage of them that actually are - therefore there is no need to be offended by this advertisement. Rather, this is an admonition and a wake-up call that the rest of humanity no longer wants to tolerate unwarranted aggression, plain and simple.
(5) And yes, of course, though we are not likely to see any commercials addressing this, there are women who are just as predatory, just as evil, just as vicious, and just as wrong as the worst men could be. This commercial might not bring it up, but this page certainly does not let them off the hook from the same exact behavior. We do not accept this behavior from men or women, and we don't permit either of them to use their gender for means of exoneration.
There is toxic masculinity, and there is no denying its existence. And there are women who are just as toxic as any male can be.
Let's put aside our need to condemn what this commercial says, and make an effort to understand why it's being said. And when we're finished doing that, let's raise the next generation with a better understanding of right and wrong. Once the desire to bully is eliminated, the need to "teach kids to fight" will disappear, and we just might have a more peaceful and less divisive world to live in.
I EXIST. RESPECT ALL.
I MATTER. BEFRIEND FEW.
I BELONG. LOVE ONE.
I DESERVE. HATE NONE.
MOTHER PROTECT US.
FATHER EMBOLDEN US.
EMOTIONAL MATURITY
This blog is meant for the advancement, redemption, and self actualization of those who have not been taught how to properly manage their emotions, and have suffered due to this lack of information. While we in no way defend those who have harmed us, we also do not make ourselves triggered and manipulated by people and things we cannot control. Through the application of the Eight Pillars, we can move forward and become the strong, unflappable, respectable people we were meant to be.
